Question 90 (The Impossible Quiz Book)
Question 90 of The Impossible Quiz Book is the fortieth question in Chapter 2, and the tenth question to use the Modern video game era-inspired visual theme. Halfway through this final stretch of the game, you are presented with what appears to be a standard yet unskippable four-option question, which contains a rather odd statement: "A Phlovomite approaches...", as well as four options, which say "Fight!", "Run!", "Hide!" and "Bab yourself!". You may don't know why you would be told such a thing by a question from the Phlovomite's Guide to the Galaxy, though it wouldn't be wrong to assume that a real Phlovomite is approaching Chris outside of the device. Either way, the player can't just run away from someone, especially in an occasion like this; that would make the player look like a coward. Sometimes you just need to face the enemy, which is why the correct option is "Fight!". However, in an unexpected turn of events, after correctly choosing the answer, the screen will flash in black and white before cutting to a completely white background with a text box in the lower part. Chris and a Phlovomite will then slide into view facing each other, with Chris's name, level (69) and health bar appearing to his right, similarly to how the Phlovomite has a counter with six empty round spaces (with only one of them filled) to his left. The text box below them makes a statement that perfectly describes the situation: "PHLOVOMITE would like to battle!". This means that the player has reached the Chapter's fourth and final boss question, and the inspiration for it is none other than the long-living series of role-playing games born during the 90's: it's time now for a "Pokémon" battle. The rules are simple: if the player wins the battle, he/she will proceed right away. If the player loses, however, Chris will just rage-quit and the screen will black out, hallucinating about losing a life (and effectively losing one) before the battle starts all over. The battle will begin with the Phlovomite sending out one of two possible enemies (not actual Pokémon). The player is in control of Level 69 Chris, and he/she have four possible attacks to use during this boss question: Bite, Scratch, Poke and Meow. Only the first three do damage; the fourth one does absolutely nothing, other than writing "U MAD!?" on the text box. The player will have to choose his/her attack depending on who his/her enemy is; just like type match-ups, all you need is some common sense to pick the attack with the advantage. The two possible opponents the player might face are Eye-On-Legs (level 27) and Bacon (level 56). ---- :1) PHLOVOMITE sent out EYE ON LEGS! It's one of Splapp-Me-Do's own characters. Compared to the Phlovomite's other Pokémon, this one is relatively easier to beat since its level is way lower than Chris'. Its only attack is called Scrotal Slap, which is super effective against Chris and will deduct about 4/10 of his HP. To beat it, you must simply attack him using Poke twice or Scratch twice, since doing so to someone's eyes in real life would be extremely painful. These are super effective against it and deduct half of Eye on Legs' health. After attacking twice with either of the two moves, it will be defeated and you will win the battle. The Phlovomite will then slide back into view, with the text "PHLOVOMITE was defeated!" appearing on the text box, followed by his reaction to being defeated: "I hate you, you little ginger bumhole.". ---- :2) PHLOVOMITE sent out BACON! An odd creature that looks like a normal human wearing a suit and a blank circle with a picture of bacon covering its entire face. This one is a harder opponent with a deadly move called Facestab. This attack can get Chris killed instantly, without even being super-effective against him. It also has another less effective move called Sizzle, which will barely do damage to Chris. To beat this Pokémon, the player must only attack it using Bite twice. This is the only effective move against it; attempting to attack him with any other move will most probably result in the player's failure. Chris will take half of Bacon's HP away with every bite, so two of them should be enough. After defeating Bacon, the Phlovomite will also scroll into view as the same victory text appears, though his reaction to being defeated is actually different. Rather, the text will display: "PHLOVOMITE has found A FEZ. Fezzes are cool.". ---- Should the player turn out as the winner of the battle in either case, a big black 9 written in a retro video game-styled font briefly appear on screen (similarly to the "5", the "7" and the "1" that have followed the different firmware updates of the device), before the player proceeds right away. Thus the player continues his/her process through the questions of the Phlovomite's Guide to the Galaxy. There is no firmware update this time around, which means that the player must keep going through the remaining 10 questions inspired by the Modern video game era. Trivia *While the mechanism of the "Pokémon" games has been for the most part replicated in this mini-game, it doesn't involve gaining experience points or levelling-up. This is because it's a one-off special occasion, and there will be no other Pokémon battle after this one. *The music used during the battle is a remix of the Kanto Trainer Battle music from the Johto-based Pokémon games (Gold/Silver/Crystal and their remakes HeartGold/SoulSilver). The remix was made by Newgrounds user ChEsDeRmAn, it's simply called "Pokemon Battle", and you can listen to it by clicking here. *The line of text that follows the defeat of Bacon, where the Phlovomite finds a fez and fezzes are stated to be cool, is a reference to TV series "Doctor Who". Fezzes have recurrently appeared through the show, and at one point one of the Doctor's incarnation took a fez from an exhibition and proudly wore it, and when queried by another character, he simply answered: "It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool". *The Bacon enemy is actually the Spy from "Team Fortress 2", wearing a mask with a picture of bacon on it. *Like in Questions 70 and 80, the player can press the Tab key at will during the entirety of the Pokémon battle without getting a Game Over (unless the player presses it during the question at the beginning of it). *In the game's "Credits" section, specifically in the part that lists all of the music tracks used, this particular question was named "Jokémon". Category:Questions Category:The Impossible Quiz Book Category:Chapter 2 Category:Unskippable Questions Category:Variable Questions Category:Mini-Game Questions